When someone is ill or injured, one of the best things that can really lift spirits is a visit from family or friends. As well, it can also be the source of much distress, for both the sick person and the person trying to "do good"!
Yes, visiting the sick or grieving may be be a source of real discomfort for some. "What do I say?" "What should I say?" "I don't know what to say!" "What if I say something stupid?" may be going through your mind.
But go ahead and do visit if you can. Do make that phone call. Or even an email or a text. It will mean so much to your friend or family member.
Well, there are blunders of course. Just know though, you really don't have to say anything. You do not need to bombard them with questions about their illness.
But the biggest blunder is to not do anything. Your friend or family member needs to hear from you, not be left alone in this difficult time!
They need to hear or know that you care about them.
Just a simple "Hello, I was thinking of you" phone call (or card, or email, or text) is actually one of the best things you can do or say to lift spirits!
But not just when they are in the hospital. Or when there is a funeral. But weeks afterward. That is really when they need to hear from you! During the long and many times lonely weeks/ months of recovery and healing.
You see, it is not about information, it is not about the length of a visit. (In fact, the shorter the visit, the better!)
It is about relationship. Supporting each other with love through life's tough times.
That is what brings comfort and hope!
It is not what you say, it is your presence that makes all the difference.
Years ago after my mother died, a friend just sat with me and we watched the moon rise. No conversation, but I sure was glad she was there.
Think of the times or things others have done for you that helped you through the tough times. And now, pass it on.
And again, that is what brings comfort and hope!
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